“I don’t want to be married just to be married. I can’t think of anything lonelier than spending the rest of my life with someone I can’t talk to, or worse, someone I can’t be silent with.” ~ Mary Ann Shaffer
Now I would call that a profound statement. So true. Of all that you can share with a partner the two most important things would definitely be your words and your silence. If you can’t share either or both with that special someone then you are better off alone! Why is it that we are unable to share words with some people without them misunderstanding it and similarly share our silence with someone without them being insulted or hurt or perplexed by it? Communication sure is tricky business and the day we can be sure of communicating our message to the intended recipient without any doubts, I can say that will be our day of self actualization 🙂
So coming back to Shaffer’s quote, we come to the topic of loneliness. Even though tomes have been written on this subject I am sure each one of us is aware of exactly how it feels to be lonely and if we think deep enough and are brutally honest with ourselves then we will realize that our lives are spent trying to ensure that we don’t have to experience that feeling of loneliness again! Every dream of ours, every action we take, the words we use, the relationships we nurture, all are basically aimed at ensuring we have company.
Think of it, after all what is the point of life if we can’t share it with someone we like? Rather I should say we all need one witness to our lives. One person (it could be anyone, not necessarily a spouse!) who commits to being a part of your life, till either one of you moves on to another plane of existence. If we are unable to find this one person in our entire life, then obviously our life will be about our search for this person. And if we are lucky to find that person and each of you make that commitment to each other to share your lives together then remember, you are one of the rare few. You are blessed indeed. Cherish that relationship forever.
I would like to leave you with a quote by my favorite poet – the Sufi mystic Rumi –
“Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing
and rightdoing there is a field.
I’ll meet you there.
When the soul lies down in that grass
the world is too full to talk about.”