“I am no longer looking for the perfect partner.
I am my own perfect partner.”
This was sent to me as part of an astrological mailing list I’m part of and it set me thinking. Being a single female in her 30’s and having been on several matrimonial sites unsuccessfully for a while now, it seemed to make a lot of sense to me. There have been several occasions when I’ve been plagued with the doubt as to whether the problem is me.
Am I too choosy? Do I expect too much out of a partner? Are my aspirations unrealistic? Am I covering up for my own shortcomings?
Maybe I need to become my own perfect partner first. Unless I love myself unconditionally, the possibility of my loving someone else unconditionally remains distant. And I believe love is unconditional. So there it is. Sounds very simple. But it is not. Introspecting and understanding oneself is a process that happens over a period of time. For some, this might take a lifetime and for others it might be in an instant! I’m hoping here that it doesn’t take a lifetime for me to get there.
So how does one go about accepting one’s faults, weaknesses, addictions? After accepting them how do we proceed to the next stage of transcending them and moving on. Or is it not like that? Accepting them ensures we define the problem and that perhaps will lead to more possibility of dealing with the problem constructively. But meanwhile we need to forgive ourselves and stop punishing the person while focusing on the problem.
While I continue dreaming about the perfect relationship, here is the full poem:
“I am no longer looking for the perfect partner
to salve all my wounds
and fix all my mix-ups
and bridge all my chasms.
I am no longer looking for the perfect partner
because I am my own perfect partner.”